I am terrified of growing up; I don’t want to work 8 hours a day, pay bills, clean a house or iron my clothes! I don’t want to be weighed down by responsibilities, or have to stress about adult-y things.
However, the day will come where I will have to face these concerns, but I want to do so with the promise to always stay young from within.
I may get wrinkles on my face, shakes in my hands and clouds over my mind, but surely my heart will remain unchanged. Today, I vow to myself to never let the things that make me happy go. I vow to myself to never hold back due to fears of looking foolish, or use the phrase ‘do you think I’m too old for that?’
Because if you think the answer to the above question is yes, that means you should definitely go for it.
At the age of 17, I have just spent a day at a farm that I often visited with my mum as a child. I remember the drill: Get the animal food from the counter, feed the animals but remember to wash your hands afterwards, have a picnic on the grass for lunch and end the day in the indoor play area. I remember the sheer joy of days like this in the past, when the animals seemed so big compared to little me.
On my way there today, I was slightly worried that it would be anticlimactic. I was worried that it would ruin my views of the place, because it wouldn’t seem as wild or extravagant as it did when I was a kid.
Well guess what?
It 100% lived up to little me’s expectations.
My friends and I had the picnic (just as I would with my family many years ago), and we even managed to go in the play area despite being too old; finally a benefit of being tiny for my age! The drop slide admittedly still scared me a little, and I felt that old-time adrenaline rush of just running around for the sake of it. Why does it stop being socially acceptable to do this kind of thing when you grow up?
Socially acceptable or not, I think it would be stupid not to relive some things that you loved in the past; even just to rekindle old memories.
I can’t wait until one day I have my own children whom I can share these experiences with. But until then? I will just keep re-living them.